2 posts from me in a week? Madness! But I'm pretty excited and wanted to share.
I just got back from my check-in with my nutritionist. Not the one at my surgeon's office, the one I've been seeing since 1994.
She, of course, weighed me. And although I feel that the weight was artificially low since I've been subsisting on primarily protein shakes for 2 days, it did reflect a substantial loss since the last time I saw her on Jan 19th.
She looked back over my records and discovered that I haven't been this low since 2003. I feel like I'm turning back time!
My Progress
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Fill #5
I'm getting to be an old pro at this. My surgeon does fills every 4 weeks for the 1st six months or so after surgery. I had my 5th fill yesterday and it was uneventful. I lost 1.5 lbs since Fill #4. (sadly this was up 1.2 lbs from my Sunday weight for the Spring Challenge.)
I'm resisting the urge to say I "only" lost 1.5. I was feeling pretty bad about that and then I tried to reframe it (all those years of therapy are paying off!)... That means I've lost just over 20 lbs in the 5 months since surgery. That's about a pound a week. Not stellar, but still pretty respectable. And, quite frankly, I doubt I could have done even that without having the band. I've also lost just over 40 lbs since I first met with Dr. R back in June 2010. Again, not breaking any records. But every time I go see him, I weigh a little bit less I did the last time. I can be satisfied with that.
Since after the last fill I finally started "feeling it", we only added .5cc to bring me up to 7.5cc I'm getting close I think. We'll see what this one does as I progress back up to solid foods.
After Fill #4 I could still eat pretty much all solid foods. I avoided bread, but had no trouble with any meats. Occasionally I would make the mistake of drinking some water too soon after eating. That is a weird feeling. But (knocking on wood) nothing has gotten stuck thus far.
Bathroom renovations still aren't done. The past 4 weeks I've been consistently going to the gym 4x a week, so that's one good thing out of it. Hopefully I don't lose momentum. I hate going. But I like how it feels afterwards so I hate not going too. Is that weird?
I'm resisting the urge to say I "only" lost 1.5. I was feeling pretty bad about that and then I tried to reframe it (all those years of therapy are paying off!)... That means I've lost just over 20 lbs in the 5 months since surgery. That's about a pound a week. Not stellar, but still pretty respectable. And, quite frankly, I doubt I could have done even that without having the band. I've also lost just over 40 lbs since I first met with Dr. R back in June 2010. Again, not breaking any records. But every time I go see him, I weigh a little bit less I did the last time. I can be satisfied with that.
Since after the last fill I finally started "feeling it", we only added .5cc to bring me up to 7.5cc I'm getting close I think. We'll see what this one does as I progress back up to solid foods.
After Fill #4 I could still eat pretty much all solid foods. I avoided bread, but had no trouble with any meats. Occasionally I would make the mistake of drinking some water too soon after eating. That is a weird feeling. But (knocking on wood) nothing has gotten stuck thus far.
Bathroom renovations still aren't done. The past 4 weeks I've been consistently going to the gym 4x a week, so that's one good thing out of it. Hopefully I don't lose momentum. I hate going. But I like how it feels afterwards so I hate not going too. Is that weird?
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Still Here
Wow, it's been well over a month since my last post. I have been reading everyone's blogs and commenting where I could. I just really haven't had much to report. No great NSV's or SV's for that matter. No major life accomplishments. Not even any drama.
I'm struggling, but it's really my own fault and I know it. I'm not being overly mindful of the rules and what I'm doing. I'm not gaining. I'm losing, just very slowly. And that's okay. I keep reminding myself, I'm not gaining.
I had my 4th fill last month and got another 1.0 cc added to bring me up to 7cc now. My band is now 1/2 full. To be sure, I can definitely eat a lot less than I used to be able to pre-band. I can longer stuff a whole large pizza in my face. But I can still eat 1/2 a pizza if given the chance. I have to work on reminding myself that just because I can doesn't mean I need to. I'm finally feeling some legit restriction. I'm surprised by the small amount of food that I actually require to feel satisfied.
Anyway, I was down 4.5 lbs at my last visit for a total of 39lbs lost since the beginning of this adventure. 20 pre-op and 19 post-op. I haven't been on a scale in a few weeks. I need to though. I have another fill next week and need to know what to expect when I get on their scale.
My non band related life is in complete upheaval. Work has been insane. It's annual statement time at my company. 10 years ago when I first started in the deparment I'm in we had 13 people working on our portion. Now it's just me. I'm the last man standing as it were. So stressful. But at least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and I might get a day off in a couple of weeks.
At home my bathroom is being remodeled. It is important to note that we only have the 1 bathroom in our house. Thankfully they hook the toilet back up every night before they leave. Because, although showering at the gym or my parents' house is getting old.... having to get in the car to drive over to my mom's at 3am if nature calls in the middle of the night is not a good time in my book.
One good thing about the remodel is that it's forced me back to the gym. I have to shower. Sometimes it's just more convenient to shower at the gym. And if I'm going to go to the gym I might as well get a workout in, right? So hopefully I can get back into the swing of things there. I've been going 4 days a week for the past 3 weeks. That's not quite I had been doing pre-op, but a heck of a lot better than I've been doing since the surgery.
I'm looking forward to the Spring Challenge. I need the accountability and the encouragement. I like these challanges for defined periods of time. It's perfect, too because the challenge ends right before my Vegas Vacation and I have a mini goal for myself. I'd like to weigh less on April 17 when we fly out than I did when we went for our wedding in 2005. I'm close. But I've been hovering here for a while now. I need something to push me past it.
I'm struggling, but it's really my own fault and I know it. I'm not being overly mindful of the rules and what I'm doing. I'm not gaining. I'm losing, just very slowly. And that's okay. I keep reminding myself, I'm not gaining.
I had my 4th fill last month and got another 1.0 cc added to bring me up to 7cc now. My band is now 1/2 full. To be sure, I can definitely eat a lot less than I used to be able to pre-band. I can longer stuff a whole large pizza in my face. But I can still eat 1/2 a pizza if given the chance. I have to work on reminding myself that just because I can doesn't mean I need to. I'm finally feeling some legit restriction. I'm surprised by the small amount of food that I actually require to feel satisfied.
Anyway, I was down 4.5 lbs at my last visit for a total of 39lbs lost since the beginning of this adventure. 20 pre-op and 19 post-op. I haven't been on a scale in a few weeks. I need to though. I have another fill next week and need to know what to expect when I get on their scale.
My non band related life is in complete upheaval. Work has been insane. It's annual statement time at my company. 10 years ago when I first started in the deparment I'm in we had 13 people working on our portion. Now it's just me. I'm the last man standing as it were. So stressful. But at least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and I might get a day off in a couple of weeks.
At home my bathroom is being remodeled. It is important to note that we only have the 1 bathroom in our house. Thankfully they hook the toilet back up every night before they leave. Because, although showering at the gym or my parents' house is getting old.... having to get in the car to drive over to my mom's at 3am if nature calls in the middle of the night is not a good time in my book.
One good thing about the remodel is that it's forced me back to the gym. I have to shower. Sometimes it's just more convenient to shower at the gym. And if I'm going to go to the gym I might as well get a workout in, right? So hopefully I can get back into the swing of things there. I've been going 4 days a week for the past 3 weeks. That's not quite I had been doing pre-op, but a heck of a lot better than I've been doing since the surgery.
I'm looking forward to the Spring Challenge. I need the accountability and the encouragement. I like these challanges for defined periods of time. It's perfect, too because the challenge ends right before my Vegas Vacation and I have a mini goal for myself. I'd like to weigh less on April 17 when we fly out than I did when we went for our wedding in 2005. I'm close. But I've been hovering here for a while now. I need something to push me past it.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
I'm the Tortoise
My weight loss has been painfully slow. But at least I'm losing. Whenever I get weighed at my surgeon's office it has always been down from the time before. I have to keep reminding myself of that. I'm not breaking any records, but I'm plugging along... and that's better progress than in any of my previous attempts at this battle. It's been 7 months since I first met with the surgeon. In that 7 months I've slowly (but surely) managed to lose over 35 lbs. I went in for my 3rd fill on Monday. (Only) down 1.5lbs since my last appt 5 weeks ago. He added another cc to bring me up to 5cc in my 14cc band. He reminded me that most patients he sees with this size band don't really feel the restriction until around 8cc so I'm doing fine. And my weight is down...which is especially good considering the time of year.
It's a snow day here for me. I normally work from home on Weds so it's not really a snow day... I still have to work, I'm just housebound due to the foot of snow in my driveway... and the 4' of snow left at the end of my driveway from the plows. I hate winter and every year I wonder why it is I stay in New England when I hate winter this much. Hopefully my father won't be too tired when he gets home from work and snowblows his driveway to come over and do mine as well. Oh wait, that's why I stay here... it is sometimes very handy to have my parents live about a mile away.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
3 Months!
It's been exactly 3 months since my surgery. It seems so long ago, but it also seems like no time has passed at all.
I got a phone call today from one of my dear friends who lives out of state. We were roommates in college for one semester and we've been extremely close (although not geographically) ever since. She is one of the few people who knows about my band. Well, it turns out her mother-in-law has been approved for surgery so she was asking me questions and stuff about my progress. And that got me thinking....
Sometimes I look at the fact that I've lost about 35 pounds since my initial consultation and am amazed. That's the most I've ever lost in such a short time frame. But then I consider that I lost 20 of that pre-op so only 15 in the 3 months since surgery. 5 lbs/month is okay... but am I really doing that great with a band? Then I tell myself that I've only had 2 fills. I have 4cc in my band. They told me from the get-go that most patients with my size band don't reach optimum level until 8cc's or so... that means I've got a ways to go and that means I'm probably doing okay considering the band isn't working at full capacity. Yeah, I talk to myself a lot. Back and forth. It's exhausting!
Despite my self-doubt, I will admit that I've made progress and I'm genuinely happy with how I'm doing. I've lost enough weight already that my clothes are fitting better, I'm fitting better in seats and such, people have noticed the loss. But I'm not losing so rapidly that people are questioning it. I can tell there's a difference already so I'm trying to keep the momentum going.
I'm ending 2010 weighing less than I started the year. I'm going to take that as a victory. For me that's actually a pretty significant victory.
I don't typically make New Year's Resolutions. I mean, I love that this is the time for retrospection and renewal and I'd be lying to you if I said I didn't tell myself "this will be the year" every freakin' year. But I really do think that 2011 will be a year of positive changes for me. Made possible by one positive change I made in 2010.
Happy New Year, everyone!
I got a phone call today from one of my dear friends who lives out of state. We were roommates in college for one semester and we've been extremely close (although not geographically) ever since. She is one of the few people who knows about my band. Well, it turns out her mother-in-law has been approved for surgery so she was asking me questions and stuff about my progress. And that got me thinking....
Sometimes I look at the fact that I've lost about 35 pounds since my initial consultation and am amazed. That's the most I've ever lost in such a short time frame. But then I consider that I lost 20 of that pre-op so only 15 in the 3 months since surgery. 5 lbs/month is okay... but am I really doing that great with a band? Then I tell myself that I've only had 2 fills. I have 4cc in my band. They told me from the get-go that most patients with my size band don't reach optimum level until 8cc's or so... that means I've got a ways to go and that means I'm probably doing okay considering the band isn't working at full capacity. Yeah, I talk to myself a lot. Back and forth. It's exhausting!
Despite my self-doubt, I will admit that I've made progress and I'm genuinely happy with how I'm doing. I've lost enough weight already that my clothes are fitting better, I'm fitting better in seats and such, people have noticed the loss. But I'm not losing so rapidly that people are questioning it. I can tell there's a difference already so I'm trying to keep the momentum going.
I'm ending 2010 weighing less than I started the year. I'm going to take that as a victory. For me that's actually a pretty significant victory.
I don't typically make New Year's Resolutions. I mean, I love that this is the time for retrospection and renewal and I'd be lying to you if I said I didn't tell myself "this will be the year" every freakin' year. But I really do think that 2011 will be a year of positive changes for me. Made possible by one positive change I made in 2010.
Happy New Year, everyone!
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
New Pants
Don't you just love going shopping in your own closet?
I'm sure I'm not alone when I admit that I have a good 3-4 size range in my closet. Which probably goes a long way in explaining how I can have a rack full of clothes, yet nothing to wear.
I've been wearing a size 24 pant for a couple of years now. Sort of. (I hate how even 2 pairs of pants bought at Lane Bryant won't fit the same way. ) Admittedly, I should try things on before I buy them, but I hate trying things on in the store so I buy it, take it home, try it on and if it fits, I wear it. If it doesn't fit, it eventually ends up in the closet hoping that it will fit "someday".
Anyway... most of my work pants are getting a little embarrassing. I've been able to pull them on and off without unbuttoning most of them for some time. Since surgery I've noticed that even my "tight" pants are looser. The pants that did fit, don't anymore and it just makes me look frumpy. Fat and frumpy is not a good combination.
Last week I found a pair of size 22 navy dress pants in my closet... tags still attached. With fingers crossed I tried them on. They fit! Comfortably! "Someday" is here for those pants!
Today I found a pair (also with tags still on) of size 24 khaki's that had previously not buttoned... slid them on and buttoned them up without issue. I'll have to unbutton them to take them off, but I think I can live with that!
Hmmm.... I have an adorable black dress in my closet that has never fit quite right. I wonder if it will be any better now. Maybe I've found a dress for New Year's... without having to bust out the credit card!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Let the festivities begin!
Tonight I'm having a party. I actually throw parties a lot... always a theme! For my birthday I have a murder mystery party every year and it's always a blast. More and more people join in every year. Last year I had 35 characters at the party! This year the company I get the mysteries from came out with a holiday murder mystery so I decided to do a special Christmas edition (but on a smaller scale since we clearly can't do an outdoor party in December in New England and my house can't comfortably hold 35 people at once!!) So, 15 of my friends and family are coming over tonight dressed as elves and reindeer. It's sure to be a riot. But, damn, parties are a lot of work. And a lot of food.
I learned how to throw a party from my mother. From her I learned that the worst thing that can happen at a party is to run out of food or have a guest go hungry because there is nothing there that they like. So, there is always variety and there is always enough so that everyone can have some of everything. This is a double edged sword because while it's nice to be known as a great hostess, it's tough to deal with leftovers. Over the years (and over the past few months especially)... I've gotten better about sending things home with people or just plain throwing it away. My best strategy is to leave everything out overnight. If I still want to eat the stuff that's been sitting open all night the next day... I've got bigger problems than I thought!
Right after I got banded I worried about how my social life would be affected. Would I still be able to throw the parties my guests are used to? Will I ruin it for myself because I have no self-control? Will people comment about my own changes in eating and make me uncomfortable? Will I not have much fun if I don't drink as much? The good news is, nothing's really changed. My Halloween party was a great success. Sure, I ate more candy than I probably should have, but it was infinitely better than past years. At game night a few weeks ago I didn't serve chips and dip (I lose all resolve around onion dip) and no one commented. And it turns out that no one actually pays all that much attention to what I do and don't eat at a party... or at least they don't say anything about it to me! I also learned I don't have to be drunk to have fun. Plus, drinking usually leads me to the chips and dip.
The one thing that still plagues me though is keeping myself in check during the prep. Party prep is insanely stressful for me. Every time I wonder why I put myself through it. The planning, the shopping, the cleaning, the cooking, the making sure everyone is having a good time, more cleaning... but at the end of the night after everyone has left well fed and happy, I realize it's actually worth it. But... during the stressful party prep period (which for me lasts a couple of days) I tend to eat. For distraction, as a stress reliever or just because party food is so much fun and tasty!
The reason I'm putting this out here in blogland is because yesterday and already this morning I've found myself sampling. Testing. Taking bites here and there. This has made me not hungry for my actual meals with actual nutritive value. The scale was kind to me the other day. I've got my official weigh-in tomorrow. I don't want to blow it with this mindless grazing. My plan for today is not eat any of the party food until the actual party. I will eat my planned meals today and hopefully that will help steer clear of the goodies.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not about deprivation. (clearly!!) But if I'm going to enjoy an oreo truffle... I should wait until they're finished and savor one. I shouldn't snack on pizza toppings as I'm preparing dinner. I should wait until it's done and enjoy the complete experience. I will have snacks tonight, but there's no need to camp out in front of the cheese and crackers. I have cheese and crackers all the time... these ones aren't any different!
Okay... it's T-minus 10 hours until I have to have my house transformed into the North Pole. I still have favors to put together, a house to clean and a ton of food to prepare. Wish me luck! I hope everyone enjoys their weekend!!
I learned how to throw a party from my mother. From her I learned that the worst thing that can happen at a party is to run out of food or have a guest go hungry because there is nothing there that they like. So, there is always variety and there is always enough so that everyone can have some of everything. This is a double edged sword because while it's nice to be known as a great hostess, it's tough to deal with leftovers. Over the years (and over the past few months especially)... I've gotten better about sending things home with people or just plain throwing it away. My best strategy is to leave everything out overnight. If I still want to eat the stuff that's been sitting open all night the next day... I've got bigger problems than I thought!
Right after I got banded I worried about how my social life would be affected. Would I still be able to throw the parties my guests are used to? Will I ruin it for myself because I have no self-control? Will people comment about my own changes in eating and make me uncomfortable? Will I not have much fun if I don't drink as much? The good news is, nothing's really changed. My Halloween party was a great success. Sure, I ate more candy than I probably should have, but it was infinitely better than past years. At game night a few weeks ago I didn't serve chips and dip (I lose all resolve around onion dip) and no one commented. And it turns out that no one actually pays all that much attention to what I do and don't eat at a party... or at least they don't say anything about it to me! I also learned I don't have to be drunk to have fun. Plus, drinking usually leads me to the chips and dip.
The one thing that still plagues me though is keeping myself in check during the prep. Party prep is insanely stressful for me. Every time I wonder why I put myself through it. The planning, the shopping, the cleaning, the cooking, the making sure everyone is having a good time, more cleaning... but at the end of the night after everyone has left well fed and happy, I realize it's actually worth it. But... during the stressful party prep period (which for me lasts a couple of days) I tend to eat. For distraction, as a stress reliever or just because party food is so much fun and tasty!
The reason I'm putting this out here in blogland is because yesterday and already this morning I've found myself sampling. Testing. Taking bites here and there. This has made me not hungry for my actual meals with actual nutritive value. The scale was kind to me the other day. I've got my official weigh-in tomorrow. I don't want to blow it with this mindless grazing. My plan for today is not eat any of the party food until the actual party. I will eat my planned meals today and hopefully that will help steer clear of the goodies.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not about deprivation. (clearly!!) But if I'm going to enjoy an oreo truffle... I should wait until they're finished and savor one. I shouldn't snack on pizza toppings as I'm preparing dinner. I should wait until it's done and enjoy the complete experience. I will have snacks tonight, but there's no need to camp out in front of the cheese and crackers. I have cheese and crackers all the time... these ones aren't any different!
Okay... it's T-minus 10 hours until I have to have my house transformed into the North Pole. I still have favors to put together, a house to clean and a ton of food to prepare. Wish me luck! I hope everyone enjoys their weekend!!
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